Over the last few weeks, we explored the idea of limiting beliefs. Hopefully, you began challenging your beliefs that are no longer serving you especially around goals or intentions that somehow have never come been realized. Today we are going to dive into what may be the greatest obstacle of all—procrastination! Put off, delay, postpone, ignore… whatever you choose to call it, we all do it.
Here's a funny, and truth-telling short video that demonstrates just how easy it is to procrastinate. Now, I bet you laughed watching it. We laugh because we see ourselves in that storyline.
So many of us have goals, dreams and deep desires that we long to achieve; yet year after year they remain uncompleted and on a to-do list. Wouldn’t it be great to finally check them off? To show the world that you did it!
First, you must ask what it is that you really are procrastinating and why?
You see the reason we procrastinate is that in some odd way it is serving us. We put off doing things, not because we can't, but because there is a payoff. We are getting something in return for staying where we are.
Let's dig in. How do you procrastinate? Do you clean, shop, make more to-do lists, save or care for other's needs before your own, binge watch Netflix? How about the number one addiction today—getting lost staring at your devices, scrolling the Internet or social media? This is a perfect recipe for ending up down a rabbit hole, in some sort of judgment zone, comparing yourself or your life to others!
Now, what is it you are really procrastinating? Is it having that hard conversation? Is it starting that business, writing that book, leaving that relationship? Maybe it's finding that healthy partner, self-care or living a life of joy?
Here are some examples to consider:
Maybe the reason you haven’t written that book is that you would be sharing a family secret with the world. That doesn't feel safe.
Perhaps the reason you haven’t left that soul-sucking job is that your dad told years ago that this creative thing you do is a great hobby, but not a real way to make a living. He said you need a real job with benefits and a 401k. By staying you are proving someone (your dad) right... maybe even making him proud.
If you lose weight you might attract a partner and must be intimate. If you are intimate you will have to be vulnerable. You are staying as you are as a sort of self-protection.
If you went back to school for that degree, then you would be taking responsibility for your happiness and success. This would mean you couldn’t be the victim of your circumstances any longer. Sometimes it's just easier to stay where you are.
If you created space on your desk or in your calendar, then you wouldn’t appear so busy and someone might ask you for time or attention! But if you keep busy, it keeps up the appearance of productivity.
Here’s one, if you took cooking classes then you might be expected to be the chef in your home. This means you could no longer manipulate others to do the cooking, a thing you don’t want to do anyway.
Do you get it? If you haven’t done or achieved this goal it is because you are getting something in return—it is serving you in some way!
Yes, there is a cost of not achieving your goals. There are probably several costs. Your health, authenticity, being a positive role model for your kids, living in integrity, the burden of living in guilt, shame, regret…. the list could go on and on.
But, it’s not until the COSTS becomes greater than the PAYOFFS that you will take action. I’ll say it again... when the costs become greater than the payoffs, then you will do something about it.
Are you there yet?
A FREE GIFT FOR YOU
I’d like to offer this worksheet as a gift to help you mindfully examine the reasons you have been procrastinating rather than completing your goals, dreams, and deep desires.
This exercise has helped many of my clients move, shift, and transform their lives and I am certain you too will gain valuable personal insight from it.
Get Your Free Worksheet Now
Complete the form below to download your worksheet and begin exploring what and why you are procrastinating.