Today, we'll continue our journey to clear the clutter by focusing on a huge energy drainer we all experience—our WORRIES.
A colleague once asked me to name the five most dominant worries I was experiencing at that moment in time. It was a powerful question because what I recognized was that these worries were precisely the reason why my energy felt zapped and why I was having trouble focusing. The thoughts that were swirling around in my mind and occupying valuable real estate in my body were 100% directly impacting the quality of my life.
Let’s face it, today, this global pandemic seems to have center stage—in every conversation in the media, on Zoom calls, and at our kitchen tables.
Many of us awaken feeling worried, only to lay our heads on our pillow at the end of each day, continuing to marinate in worry all night.
Now, this post could very easily focus on the physical, emotional, and psychological impact of worry, but I will save that for another day. Instead, today, I would like to offer you a tool to help you confront your worries.
I will begin by saying this, "what we resist...persists."
In other words, what we deny, run from, push away, does not magically disappear. I liken it to a beach ball—the more you try to push a beachball underwater, the more it is going to want to come up. Similarly, the more you resist your worries, the more they will find a way to ooze through your pores and into your life.
Unacknowledged worry can impact your quality of sleep, your capacity to engage with others in a healthy way, your ability to practice self-care or not, and if left unaddressed worry can impact your focus, creativity, and spirit.
So, how do you address your worry? Step one, you must become aware. By naming your worry, you give permission to acknowledge it.
Follow these steps as I walk you through the process:
Take a piece of paper and write down your 5 most dominant worries today.
Example: I am worried about my 86 mother who lives alone in Portugal.
After writing these worries down, reread each and notice what it feels like in your body.
At the end of each worry, identify, and write down your greatest fear in that worry.
Example: There are many aspects of this complicated situation with my mother that worry me, but the greatest fear today is if she gets sick and needs me in an emergency, will I be able to travel there and be with her? Will she die all alone?
Read each one slowly, repeating it out loud to yourself or someone you trust. Notice the feelings and emotions that arise from the worry, and from defining the actual fears connected to it.
The invitation is not to push the discomfort away, but be with all of it. Honor the quality, frequency, and vibration in your body, heart, and mind.Take a deep breath in and a slow breath out. Allow the fullness of each breath to embrace each worry as if they were acquaintances as opposed to and enemies.
Imagine wrapping your arms around each worry to give it a hug— welcoming each one into your awareness and thanking them for whatever they are here to share with you on this day.Next, for each worry, ask yourself how true or real that worry is.
Sometimes we make up stories in our minds that are not true. Are you 100% sure that this worry could happen? Notice the answer.Next, move forward to create an action step.
If today you could do something to ease the fear, what action would you take?Do it (you do something about it)
Hire it (ask for help)
Let it Go (surrender, give it up..)
Example: At this time, I have done everything I possibly can to protect her from so far away. I call her every day, the police dept and neighbor check in on her regularly, and she wears a lifeline bracelet—There is nothing more that I can do. Today I chose to surrender, give it up to God – thy will be done.
Notice if the grip of the worry/fear has released?
When we release the grip of worry and fear, we invite healthy endorphins to activate receptors in the brain, helping to minimize discomfort and encourage general well-being. And, at this moment in time, our immune system can sure use all the help it can get!
Don't run from your worries. They are each here to bring you more awareness, to be curious and when you are ready to invite an action step or to simply surrender.