What do you do when you can't run or hide from a truth that has been revealed? When your old go-to's that served as an escape from the discomfort of those truths are not so accessible? When you no longer can shop for that perfect pair of shoes, exert pent up energy at the gym, enjoy a leisurely 2-hour lunch with a friend, or escape to the office for the day?
Right now, without those escapes at our fingertips, many of us are being forced to JUST BE. To sit with the truths, the discomforts, and the things that challenge us. To notice the habits, conditions, and qualities of ourselves, our lives, and our relationships.
Throughout this pandemic, I have spent countless hours with individuals facing the truth about their marriages that were ignored for years. Helping families learn to communicate in a healthier way. I've worked with people who are questioning careers that are no longer feeding their souls or whose unhealthy lifestyle habits have been exasperated by the isolation.
I am not suggesting that every truth revealed is a negative thing; on the contrary, having a truth revealed can be the first step to freedom or hopefully, a path to less suffering and more clarity.
Recently, on a glorious late spring day, I took my kayak out on our local lake. The sun was brilliant in the bright blue sky, and the temperature was a perfect 87 degrees with a slight breeze to make all things comfortable, especially in a kayak on the lake. Now, this is my absolute favorite place to escape to, far away from people, mask-wearing, and Zoom meetings. Paddling along the 617-acre body of water, sharing the serenity with fish, geese, an occasional blue heron, turtle, and eagle makes for a perfect retreat in the middle of the afternoon on any day... except for this day.
While heading to my treasured alcove far from other boaters, I found myself a little irritated as my peace and quiet was disturbed by a fellow kayaker who seemed to be talking on the phone loud enough that her voice was echoing off the nearby hills. It wasn’t long before I realized she was not talking on the phone but instead speaking to another woman, swimming behind her, hanging onto an upside-down kayak, tethered to her boat. It appeared they were struggling to find their way to the shoreline.
As I paddled closer, I was comforted by their shrieks and laughter that they were not in imminent danger, but I could tell they were a little nervous about their situation. So, I offered to use my phone to call for help, but they declined by saying they didn't have anyone to call. I then offered the use of my lifejacket as support and was relieved when the swimmer accepted my offer. It took them at least 30 minutes to row to shore, where I met them to retrieve the lifejacket. All along, they laughed and talked loudly—loud enough that I overheard them say that they shouldn't have been drinking so much. So much for my mid-day retreat!
When I arrived home, I shared my experience with my 23-year-old son (we call him the virus police). He immediately was appalled that I got so close to strangers, shared my lifejacket, and handled this contaminated flotation device without gloves. Truthfully, it never crossed my mind, neither before, during, and after. After all, I just saved someone from drowning, doesn't that count?!
Later on, I shared the event with my older son, who responded by saying, "If something had happened, it's their own damn fault!" and "You are such a martyr Ma—you're always saving someone!" OUCH, how did he know?!
Then, I proceeded to tell my husband, Mister safety. Yup, you guessed it, his reaction was immediately scolding, "You kayaked without your lifejacket!?"
You see, every day offers opportunities for truths to be revealed about ourselves, others, and the world.
Honestly, I wouldn't have changed a thing about how I handled the kayaking situation. It is my nature to be empathetic, compassionate, and helpful. However, I agree sometimes at the risk of my own well-being. And, at times, at the detriment of encouraging others to help themselves.
What I have learned is to consciously practice discernment, and self-awareness, without judgment. According to Swami Kripalu, it is the highest spiritual practice. It's neither good or bad, right or wrong—it is just awareness.
Are you ready to reveal truths about yourself and your life?
I invite you to take a few moments and contemplate and journal on this question; what has this unexpected pause helped to reveal? All answers are important. Consider it an opportunity to bring truth to the surface. It may be something that you have always suspected, but found a way to run or hide from it. Maybe it is a new revelation. Be curious. Be compassionate. And most of all, just try to be with it. It may require action, or it may not. But, take the time to listen to its vibration. Observe where it manifests in your body. Then, be aware of how it expresses itself in your life, and relationships with others.
I invite you to join my on-demand workshop "How Balanced is Your Life?" to take an inventory of your life—a perfect way to reveal your truths. In it, we'll hang out over your life as if in a helicopter and look at the entire landscape—noticing what areas feel green and lush and those areas that are looking a little brown and parched. With this information, I promise you can begin to take the right action.
In coaching, we have a saying—you must first be right where your feet are, to move forward anywhere else. This recorded, 90-minute workshop, "How Balanced is Your Life?" will bring awareness to where you are and help you create an actionable and achievable plan to move forward consciously and confidently.
You can learn more or sign up for the workshop here.